Always sad..

I've posted about this before with what happened to me after i had Annabella, But 7months later i am still struggling to get over what happened to me. I can't get over that i missed out caring for my newborn and i hate the fact that lots of my friends that have just had babies ask for my advice with there newborns and i can't help them because i didn't care for mine my partner did.
I was in hospital for a month when i got home Annabella was big to me and sleeping threw the night (not that i complain about that) . What i had was a 1 and 20,0000 chance of getting and i got it. Every day i say to myself "why me??"
I was very lucky and didn't get a single stretch mark when i was pregnant. But then i got ill and got odemar of the body and my body swelled with fluid to 20times its size and stretched me right around my belly to my back, Now i look in the mirror and hate what i see. I feel so lucky to be here because they didn't think i was going to make it but i also feel so sad that i missed out on my baby being a newborn   i don't even remeber holding her and i didn't even get to breast feed her i just feel like i missed out and i hate that.

Just remind yourself it's not like you did it on purpose. It's not like you chose to have what happened to you and if you could have you would have been there with her through that time. Just give her extra hugs and kisses now to make up for lost time. There is no sense in wasting precious time now sulking about something that is already over. Just cherish the fact that you made it through and are able to spend the time you want with her now.

That must have been so scary   But I agree with the other poster, you get to be with your baby girl now, that has to be the best gift of all  

<blockquote><b>Quoting milo456:</b>" That must have been so scary   But I agree with the other poster, you get to be with your baby girl now, that has to be the best gift of all  "</blockquote>



  

Do you have PPD?