Forums > Single Parentingby: Leeanne209

Break up while 5 months pregnant, what to do??

posted 28th Jun '12
Hi Girls, im from Ireland and I am 5 months pregnant. I have just this week split up from my boyfriend, well in saying that I just havnt heard anything from him in days. We had a rough start as he has an ex girlfriend and 2 kids with her, he finished with me after a couple of months but found his way back after 3 months of not seeing each other at all. He said he missed me and only realised he loved me when he had got back with the ex, they finished after 2 weeks. Well since we got back together he has been great, and he is very loving, never stops tellin me he loves me and hugging me etc and our baby was planned but the only problem is the jealous ex refused to let him see there kids because of me which put a lot of pressure on him, he gets upset every so ofter after a few drinks and i knew it was getting to him and encouraged him to see a solicitor about access rights but he felt he didnt want to go down that road. Well last week we had a little fight which turned into him thinkin about his boys and how much he misses them and he didnt want them growin up hating him and that he had go to his dads for a few days and try see the kids. I was very upset and didnt want him to go because we were parting on bad terms but he went anyway and i didnt speak to him then till sunday on the phone and he said how sorry he was and he made a big mistake and he loves me so much and wants to come home, i got very upset sunday again and might of said a lot of things that he would feel guilty about and on parting told him never to talk to me again (this is somethings i would say during all arguments but he never listened and i didnt really want him to anyway).. Monday came and he said he was going to try see the kids this day, he left me 2 missed calls on my phone at 1pm and at midnight. I didnt call him back as i was still upset from the night before but last nite and this evening i have called several times and texted and he will not answer or reply to texts. I am very shocked about this and I am so worried and stressed its killin me. All i can think of is that he has gotton back with his ex that lives very close to his dads and as he said he wud talk to her monday to see the kids. He has never once ignored me like this and i dont know what to do. I think if something was wrong he would tell me, this is why i think he might be with her as she is very controlling and would not allow him to text me or talk to me. What do you all think? Is he back with her? Or what could it possibly be??
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I live in Dublin, Ireland
account removed
posted 28th Jun '12
Well... You said a bunch of mean smurf to him then ignored his calls for a whole day ?

Maybe he is upset at you now...
quotesmurfs?
I'm due March 22nd, have 1 child & live in Colorado
posted 28th Jun '12
Seems to me that there is a lot of back and forth going on in your relationship and it wouldn't surprise me if he was with her right now. OR he could be physically hurt, phone could have died, no cell reception, or he's just ignoring you since you were being pretty smurffy towards him... Do you have another way to reach him, call his dad? Don't know what else to tell ya, you may just need to give him his space and let him be with his kids. I'd just leave him alone.
quotesmurfs?
I have 3 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Roanoke, Virginia
posted 28th Jun '12
one thing that bothered me about your post was the fact that you were trying to stop him from seeing HIS children....you should never stop a father from seeing his kids. No matter how you are feeling. Its just plain wrong. I would be so pissed if my partner did that to me...
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I have 1 child & live in California
account removed
posted 28th Jun '12
<blockquote><b>Quoting Aribean:</b>" one thing that bothered me about your post was the fact that you were trying to stop him from seeing ... [snip!] ... from seeing his kids. No matter how you are feeling. Its just plain wrong. I would be so pissed if my partner did that to me..."</blockquote>




Same. Although it bothers me he doesn't want to go to court & get actual custody/visitation for whatever reason  
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I'm due March 22nd, have 1 child & live in Colorado
posted 28th Jun '12
Quoting £ex Zeppelin:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Aribean:</b>" one thing that bothered me about your post was ... [snip!] ... Same. Although it bothers me he doesn't want to go to court & get actual custody/visitation for whatever reason  "

true but he seems like a whimp to me in some ways considering how controlling his ex is with him...so it won't be surprising if he just doesn't have any balls to confront his ex about it.
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I have 1 child & live in California
posted 29th Jun '12
I didnt stop him from seeing his kids, she stopped him because of me, I was tryin to encourage him to go for access but he never did. Anyway he didnt get in touch, his ex did sayin how messed up his head is over everything and shes goin to help get him the proessional help he needs and they are not together and never will be but hes the father of her 2 sons and he needs help so I got my answer, its a pity it wasnt from him but hes a coward and a wimp and has no balls. If he was to much of a coward to fight for his kids then I cant see him being any better when my baby arrives arrives but if he does want to see the baby I will let him untill he starts letting him down.
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I live in Dublin, Ireland
account removed
posted 29th Jun '12
<blockquote><b>Quoting Leeanne209:</b>" I didnt stop him from seeing his kids, she stopped him because of me, I was tryin to encourage him to ... [snip!] ... any better when my baby arrives arrives but if he does want to see the baby I will let him untill he starts letting him down."</blockquote>




So he out of nowhere needs professional help ? That's odd...
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I'm due March 22nd, have 1 child & live in Colorado
posted 30th Jun '12
Tell me about it.. I have to say i thought i would be a lot worse but im coping fine. I really see our relationship as a lie and u cant miss something or someone that wasnt really there. I am probably still in shock but havnt even cried since i found out what was goin on, i would rather stay feeling like this that for hurt to kick in  
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I live in Dublin, Ireland
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