20 and getting divorced

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Why are you getting divorced?

try not to let it stress you out TOO much.
you are not a horrible mother, if you're getting a divorce it would be better that, then youandyour husbandfighting all the time. That's more harmful to a child.

and it is NOT your fault that you two are getting a divorce (at least, I believe)
because it takes two people to make a marriage work.

I hope everything works out for you.

Quoting latina2g6:“ well, i've been on this site for a while now, but never posted anything, i would just look for topics ... [snip!] ... have a father .. i am just very scared stress will take over me and overshadow the happiness a child brings into ones life..”

I was going through a divorce when I had my first son and that took nothing away from the joy I felt the first time I layed eyes on my baby.

Why do you blame yourself?
And is the father planning to NOT be around? Because he can still be a dad without you and him being togeteher if he wants to be.

As long as you love your child, which I don't doubt for a moment, nothing else can get in the way of that. Remember that you are as important, if not more, to your child as he is to you. The most important thing you can ever do for your child is love him because that love will always lead you to make the decision that is right for HIM! I wish you the best of luck and am always available if you want to talk!

girl when that sweet little baby comes that will be your happiness...im sure everyone feels in one way or another they could be bad parents before the baby comes at least i did me and the father of my son split up four weeks after he was born i thought my world was coming to an end i was depressed and everything but that little boy was what i lived for...knowing you have this little creature there that you made that only has love and need for you its great and you being alone will only make you try just as hard...me and the father are together now but the first 8 months i was alone....i was hard, i was lonely, i was the only parent, but i was great at it and loved every min. of it...and the baby will still have a father..maybe not there every min like mommy will be but even if he turns out to be a daddy that always doesnt want to be around someone else will good luck tp you and sorry about your problem

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Quoting latina2g6:“ well.. its is a very long story.. but.. i found out my husband cheated on me 2 weeks before our wedding.. ... [snip!] ... im scared to make mistake after mistake after i have this child. Im a cheater, my husband is gay.. what else can go wrong??”

people make mistakes hun. If you know what you did was wrong and feel bad about it, there is nothing left to do (well, besides apologise, which you did, but I'm not going to act like you're five, lol) and my fiance's dad is gay, his parents had two children and stayed married for 15 years, that's hard for him. At least if he knows he's gay and all that NOW, it will make it a little easier for your child to deal with.

Quoting latina2g6:“ well.. its is a very long story.. but.. i found out my husband cheated on me 2 weeks before our wedding.. ... [snip!] ... im scared to make mistake after mistake after i have this child. Im a cheater, my husband is gay.. what else can go wrong??”

he can't trust yOU????


hahaha what a tool.


Hun....your baby will be the sun on a bleak day for you.


Don't stress too much....and make sure to look for signs of PPD after you have the baby.

I am sorry to hear that you are going through so much..But no matter what wrong in your life the day you see your child it all seems better. and it will all work it way out in time just let it run its course and try not to stress as everyone has said its not healthy for your baby..and its better to be a single mom the in a relationship that you are unhappy in..Good luck

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Quoting latina2g6:“ well.. its is a very long story.. but.. i found out my husband cheated on me 2 weeks before our wedding.. ... [snip!] ... im scared to make mistake after mistake after i have this child. Im a cheater, my husband is gay.. what else can go wrong?

Well him being gay has nothing to do with you at all.

And while I do not agree with cheating to get back at him, you are human and a lot of times, when someone is extremely hurt by someone they love, thier first reaction is to retaliate, even though you know it isn't right. But it's human nature and all you can do is learn from the mistakes you make.

But even with all this, that does not guarantee you'll be a bad mother and not ALL the blame is on you. Like I stated, all you can do is learn from your mistakes and move on and be the best mother you can be. You just have to decide who you love and want to concern yourself with more...Your ex or your baby?

my baby 100% .. everybody's solution was abortion.. but i couldnt do it.. i love my baby, eventhough he is not here yet.. but i just think that i have been making so many mistakes that i am not mature enough to handle the situation

Quoting latina2g6:“ Thank u.. i just keep thinking that he met someone there and wants to use it as an excuse to leave.. ... [snip!] ... be a family.. and now.. all of a sudden changing his mind.. but im thinking maybe its safer and better for meand the baby..”

Honestly, it sounds like you are better off....
However, I want to address this whole, "I'm a cheater" part... Honey, I've been there. While things were... beyond bad between my husband and I, I did some things I'm not so proud of. Do I acknowledge the fact that I was unfaithful at that time? Yes. Do I consider myself a cheater now? No. My husband knows all that happened, I owned up to what I did, he owned up to the way he treated me at the time, we settled our shit. If I walked around, every day, thinking, "I don't deserve my husband because I was weak and stupid back then", I wouldn't bother getting out of bed every morning, it's no way to look at life. We are all human and yeah, sometimes we screw up. But, it's what we do about those screw-ups that defines who we are, not the mistake itself.
Don't look at yourself as a cheater, acknowledge what you did, accept that you are human and you screwed up, and take it as a lesson, not a punishment!

Quoting Mommy2Malykai:“ As long as you love your child, which I don't doubt for a moment, nothing else can get in the way of ... [snip!] ... lead you to make the decision that is right for HIM! I wish you the best of luck and am always available if you want to talk!”

Thank you   i really appreciate it