re: so I was wondering I guess opinions

do what YOU want. make the choice for you and not some man. and as for regret.... everyone handles things differently. we cant tell you if you will regret it or not.

Quoting KD [Eli's Mommy]:" Hell, at least do something to prevent it. Besides it would be safer for her not to have sex with the guy. Who else is this guy having sex with? Obviously he isn't faithful to his wife."

we've had a 2 year relationship... He mostly doesn't like the family life with his wife stbx... So we're moving on

and I used an iud but I had an expulsion or w.e.

Quoting ℓauren:" This is a protected forum. She's asking for advice, no need to be an ass. It's not about the married man, it's about whether she aborts, adopts, or keeps her child."

I did not mean to come off like an ass.
I am aware she is asking for advice. One of the main things to consider is that if the man is untrustworthy, then if she does decide to keep the baby or adopt it out, it would be for her and the baby's protection if she didn't have sex with him.

OP:: Even if he is getting a divorce, the decision about the baby is yours. I don't know how abortion works over there, but there are usually limits of how long you can wait. Some people do regret abortion and some don't. I had my own plans before I got pregnant the first time and I miscarried as well. Then I got pregnant with my son and I even considered aborting him.
It was my choice to keep him, no one else. If you let someone force the decision on you for the sake of a relationship, then it doesn't make a good beginning.
I'm not saying he's not a great guy...but you have to decide for yourself. If anything place the baby up for adoption.

There are some hormonal effects from having an abortion, especially since you are further along.

Just be careful and make sure you are making the right decision for you.

Quoting Mama♥Sweetpea[PLG]:" I mean, if you're doing it because YOU feel it would be best.. Then i'm sure you'll learn to cope with ... [snip!] ... thing. I'd just hate to see you doing it to save a relationship that may not last if it's not something that you want. "

I guess that's my biggest fear is if I regret it. Do most regret it?
I do feel life with him would be easier in the middle of this mess. His family knows about the affair and some about the pregnancy and I don't feel welcomed I have no family here. So it feels like I'm too alone to do this on my own... Plus he wants a childless future with me he's done having kids I respect his wishes and all that but I know if I were anyone else I'd judge poorly. I never saw women who did this in a good light tbh... But I have goals and at 20 I haven't accomplished them... I would do it I planned to but now it feels not worth it like I was just keeping it because I felt I had to. Plus my previous mc makes me wonder if I could with it... I was in depression for 3 months he actually saved me with that one idk where I'd be otherwise....

Quoting KD [Eli's Mommy]:" Hell, at least do something to prevent it. Besides it would be safer for her not to have sex with the guy. Who else is this guy having sex with? Obviously he isn't faithful to his wife."

how do you know she wasn't on BC ? a lot of people are on BC & it fails. it has a very low percentage rate of failure if used correctly but it is still there. people are never just going to step having sex  

Quoting 20andneedtotlk1:" we've had a 2 year relationship... He mostly doesn't like the family life with his wife stbx... So we're moving on and I used an iud but I had an expulsion or w.e."

sorry but that is just ridiculous. if he isn't happy with his wife, he needs to leave her. he should have done that before ever cheating on her. he sounds like a smurfed up person. honestly, you should get an abortion & move on.

Your 5 months prego?? Why don't you just give the baby up for adoption ...Whatever u do Good luck with it all

I'm not sure how you jumped there pretty sure I said 10 wks nearly...

Oh i know when u said your 20.. I miss read it

<blockquote><b>Quoting £ex Zeppelin:</b>" get real"</blockquote>




!!

so I went through with it although I think it was for the best I don't like my other half right now... But I guess it's something I'll have to work out...

Quoting 20andneedtotlk1:" so I went through with it although I think it was for the best I don't like my other half right now... But I guess it's something I'll have to work out..."

glad you did what you feel was best. but that man is up and leaving the kids he already has?
that guy does not sound good at all.