Seriously, I need some tough love.

Alright, so, I'm 23 years old, I'm a nursing student at the community college here (one year away from graduation). I have two beautiful kids with a less than ideal father. Last year, I had my IUD taken out when I was diagnosed with chlamydia, and the Doc said that there was some inflammation that may become scar tissue, and that it may complicate my fertility down the line. Well, apparently not enough, because I recently found out that I'm 6 weeks pregnant. I'll be due in February, 3 months before I graduate from nursing school. The father and I broke up a month ago, he's in a new relationship, and wants me to abort it. He's made it very clear that to him, there is only one option. And I'm shattered, because this man is not who I envisioned being the father of my child. He got a DUI in November, and recently was charged with driving on a suspended. He lost his job due to the DUI, and because he's the son of a well known police officer here, he's always been sort of spoiled when it came to taking accountability. He has been extremely unsupportive, angry, and hostile since we found out last week. In some ways, I definitely see that an abortion could hold merit in this situation. But at the same time, I feel like this is my baby. And advice? Input?

If you don't want to abort, don't do it...unless that is 100 percent what YOU want to do. Good luck!

If he doesn't want to be involved then he doesn't have to, if you want to keep the baby then have him sign over his rights. That is what I had to do with my first child's biological father.

that is a very personal decision but you need to decide is keeping the baby whats best FOR the baby? Are you going to be able to provide the life the child deserves? Is it fair for you to bring another child into your current childrens lives?

These are all things that NO one can answer for you, and if you dont want to have an abortion I would suggest looking into adoption as an option as well.

You DO have options, no matter WHAT you pick just make sure its the right thing for your family and you.

Also I would suggest The abortion survivors/support thread for this. That forum is protected for those seeking advice.

If you want the baby, don't let him not being there stop you. Ultimately, it's your choice whether you want to keep it or not. He's not there, so what? You don't need a man to have a child. If you feel like you can support the baby, plus your other children, just keep it. If not, do what you think you need to do.

Its not just his child!!! If you can handle it then go for it!!!

dont abort unless you are sure. you can always take an incomplete in your classes if you start them and then finish them in a certain amount of time they allow.

Quoting a s h l e y.:" Alright, so, I'm 23 years old, I'm a nursing student at the community college here (one year away from ... [snip!] ... see that an abortion could hold merit in this situation. But at the same time, I feel like this is my baby. And advice? Input?"

It sounds like it would be in the children's (including the one you're carrying's) best interest to abort. But I think you'll struggle with the decision.

If you keep it I foresee you not graduating on time and putting major stress on yourself and your family. I think you can imagine how hard its going to be.

Quoting lolajessup:" dont abort unless you are sure. you can always take an incomplete in your classes if you start them and then finish them in a certain amount of time they allow."

No way. I refuse to settle for that. I am already a semester back because I was working so much at my old job that I was failing my microbiology class, forcing me to drop it and pushing me back a semester. If I choose to keep it, I am going to be walking across the stage in May of 2013.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Scarlett♥:</b>" If he doesn't want to be involved then he doesn't have to, if you want to keep the baby then have him sign over his rights. That is what I had to do with my first child's biological father."</blockquote>




This. Your body, your choice mama. Don't let him influence your decision one way or the other. Good luck hun.

There are so many women that have been through similar situations,, and made the choice that was right for them.

Personally, i aborted. That was what was right for me. If you cant live with an abortion, don't have one. But i wish you luck mama.

Quoting Golf Wang:" It sounds like it would be in the children's (including the one you're carrying's) best interest to ... [snip!] ... not graduating on time and putting major stress on yourself and your family. I think you can imagine how hard its going to be."

It's definitely a struggle. I always wanted to have another child (granted, with someone I was committed to and all that crap.), but I was set on the idea that I couldn't physically have any more. I think that's why I feel so attached to this baby-because I thought it was an impossibility.

Maybe I just need to learn to think of this pregnancy as a test run.

It's your choice, and no one else's, Ash.

I know you have a lot to think about. I fully support you in anything you choose <3

<blockquote><b>Quoting Maeby♥:</b>" It's your choice, and no one else's, Ash. I know you have a lot to think about. I fully support you in anything you choose <3"</blockquote>




Mae, seriously, you, Whit, Jen, Jenn, Melissa, Lauren...you guys are my backbone.I just can't believe this is happening