mom abortion adoption living situations all this evening hav

Well I finlly told my mom that I didn't want the abortion or so I thought. She wouldn't take that she went on a long soliloquy on how I should never be allowed to have a child that I was a mess... I always try to go my own way only to mess up. I always mess up because of myself. I don't want to ruin someone else's life. I always leave just to come back when I'm not fixing the actual problem. People treat me like I'm 6 or like I'm crazy one or the other. No one takes me seriously. I'm an emotional mess and to aadd pregnancy hormones idk how tht will turn out but I have for 3 months and been pretty uneffected I didn't even know I was pregnant until late May. I didn't want to think of it for awhile. I can't take care of myself well while not pregnant what to expect if she weren't around how I'll be pregnant. I live in squaller without her. I can't get up and pick up after myself. I feel sometimes I need her even though she disables my ability to function... It's a dead end but it was a disaster both the times I was gone... I don't know somehow I feel like my life is headed to be stuck in this dead end. I'm a failure without her I'd have no one to pick up after me. I feel really bad today about this it's not fair. My life just can't get better it seems. I didn't stand my ground with this to her. I never do it seems. I agreed that I should and would get an abortion... Now I'm just confused... I wish I'd just mc so I would have all this to deal with I really wish I didn't have to think of it... I just wanted a way out I actually don't care about this pregnancy... I just wish I weren't here. Why can't I have a little peace where I live? Why don't I deserve that? I guess if I do this I really don't deserve it... Idk what I'm going to do I knew talking to her would make me more complacent I should have just not brought it up now it's going to be her job to enforce I need this abortion and I'm already so torn about it... I'm so alone with this decision it's so hard not to abandon it. In a way so much that she says I know she's right but I have no alternative with living situations... But every time I leave I feel like I'm that loser because I got no skills on anything really...

Sorry to bother but I just dealt with so much this evening

If you don't want an abortion, don't have one, or you will end up regretting it.

That being said... I know it's a hard decision, but sometimes hard decisions are right decisions. Only you know what is in your heart and what you believe is right.

Good luck.

You can do whatever you set your mind to.

I've recently turned 18 and had some complications with my high school diploma so now I can't get it so I have to go get my GED, a job, a new place, and a car, ALL without my parents' help. They are trying to take full custody of my daughter because they don't think that I'm fit to be a mother. They treat me like a child also and my mother has tried to convince me that I'm not mentally well which I know is bullsmurf because she's the ONLY one who thinks so.

I'm determined to get on my feet and you can too! Just don't lose hope and stay motivated. We have to make the right decisions for our children and if you want to keep your child then you have every right to, but you must get your situations in order first!

Quoting sadlife11:" Well I finlly told my mom that I didn't want the abortion or so I thought. She wouldn't take that she ... [snip!] ... like I'm that loser because I got no skills on anything really... Sorry to bother but I just dealt with so much this evening"

you sound like your really codependent on your mother- and she sounds like she had really beaten up your self esteem in the process. Im sorry you are going through this, its your body and she cant force you to have an abortion if you dont want to. Have you considered adoption?

Quoting Freckles Ford:" If you don't want an abortion, don't have one, or you will end up regretting it. That being said... ... [snip!] ... sometimes hard decisions are right decisions. Only you know what is in your heart and what you believe is right. Good luck."

I don't want to just to confront her bout it didn't go well it actually had me thinking maybe I should but my plan doesn't seem so bad to me it's been than here tbh

Quoting SmashleynSmallyPants:" you sound like your really codependent on your mother- and she sounds like she had really beaten up ... [snip!] ... going through this, its your body and she cant force you to have an abortion if you dont want to. Have you considered adoption?"

Yeah my relationship turned that way years ago it's just really bad because she wants her way now...

I want an adoption plan that's why adoption is listed parenting isn't an option nor do I have that desire now... I am starting everything out and living arrangements but it's just while I'm at my mom's for the weekend she's trying to convince me to do this... It was just tiring...

Quoting sadlife11:" Yeah my relationship turned that way years ago it's just really bad because she wants her way now... ... [snip!] ... but it's just while I'm at my mom's for the weekend she's trying to convince me to do this... It was just tiring..."

so you dont live with her?

Quoting SmashleynSmallyPants:" so you dont live with her?"

I do live with her for now until I have my arrangements figured out which is longer than monday. Which is when she set my abortion appointment. I live with her so I have to deal with what she thinks...

sounds like her purring you down all the time and acting like she knows whats best for you, and that you are such a mess might be a big part of your problem. she actually has you believing that you need her in order to exist it sounds like.

Dont get an abortion if you feel like " I guess if I do this I really don't deserve it..."
the regret can hit pretty hard. you will probably start to resent your mother for forcing you into it too.

forget about what your mom says. YOU sit down, weigh out your morals and your situation, and your choices.
if you find in the end that abortion is the best choice, then follow through. if you feel that you would regret it, then dont. there are other resources out there for women who need help too. whatever your decision, i hope you get the hell away from that woman.

also, if you say no to the doctor while you are at the appointment, then she will still have to pay for the appt.
you could tell her that and that might change her mind about taking you all together.
jsut to get your thought together it might buy some time.

Sweetie, don't go through with something just to avoid conflict. This is a huge thing and doing it will not make the problem go away. This is your body and your baby not your mother's. She is making appointments and treating this like it is her decision but it isn't it is yours. There are lots of programs and agencies who help mommas in your shoes. Go online and look it up. Maybe this is your chance to find a voice for yourself and stand up to your mom. You can do it.
Some friends of mine were not able to have children but are awesome people and so loving and last year they adopted a little boy at birth. The mother was able to choose them from a list the agency put together of compatable families. They met before the birth and they were able to be emotional support to her (the birth mom). She almost aborted their son but decided to seek adoption and it made my friends so happy and her son now has amazing parents who love him immensely. Just something to think about. Good luck, momma!!!!

If youre thinkin about adoption I hear there are agencies that will pay for your medical expenses and living situation and help with school while you're pregnant. Maybe the distance away from your mother and support of others in your situation will do you alot of good!! You could get help with school and maybe they could help you find a job or something. Look into it!!

Sweetheart I'm sorry but you sound very very depresses and like you have been verbally abused a lot... I really hope you find some guidance and self esteem soon....I'm very worried