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How old is she?

I get it.

my SO's brother used to tell me about all the things his kid can/could do, and my typical response was "So can DD"... like, learning left from right, putting her dishes away, the alphabet... the list goes on
She's 6 - my daughter is 4.

She's is one of the most ill behaved children I have ever met. Frankly she probably thinks I"m the devil or something because I expect her to use MANNERS and ask rather than tell me things (I want chocolate milk....well that's nice....Get me some chocolate milk. No. Why? Because you didn't ask, and you didn't ask nicely."

IT took about 2 months of weekend visits but she ALWAYS uses her manners with me now.

sorry to say this but you have to keep her away from your family- its like a vine that is trying to strangle out your prized roses. dont stop being her aunt, but i would refrain from letting her influence and impact your kids. my best friend of 20 years has a daughter the same way. told her staright up. i cant have my son seeing or hearing the things your daughter says or does. shes five years older than my son and since the time he was able to stand this lil girl has pushed him down, screamed at him, scratched and has scars from my best friend daughter being downright evil to my baby. dont accept them the way they are, the last draw was when she pushed him down the top of my stairs on our porch to the cement below, she yelled "shut UP" i turned aroud and see him soaring of the porch onto the ground, he couldnt even talk. she would say demented stuff like your mom doesnt love you. or your doggy is runn over in the road- and we didnt even have a dog! i was so scared that her actions was goin to do the same thing to my son, he was goin to grow up playing with her he was goin to act like her. i got him away, im still friend with her mom, but our kids dont play, its been 7 years. she has had another daughter that is acting the same way, shes 2! bless there lil hearts and the other kids they may incounter, my kids will not be one of those kids. praying for your family and this trying subject!

Sound like normal typical behaviour to me.
My best friends daughter is the same way. It may seem immature but really its not at all.
Its the age where they try to become the boss to adults and to kids younger then them. She thinks she is acting older even though it dosnt seem like it to everyone around them. Kids never stop testing boundries. Its weither or not you let them do it or get away with it.
She is old enough to understand alot so I think sitting down with her and talking to her eye to eye level and explaining that in your house we dont say things like that and if you do you will have to sit out for an amount of time.

And make it clear that if she wants to throw a fit whatever but do it in her room or what not. I send my 4 yr old to her room to have a melt down, then she comes out when she has it out of her system.
I would also maybe try to get her understand that love is shared not by years you have known someone but by how many places someone holds in their heart or something like that. And she should be fair and play what everyone wants to play to share her time. Work with her on it.

She is eight.
I WILL NOT cut her out of out lives because she doesn't behave well for two reasons
1. My children need to learn how to deal with this kind of thing. I can't always protect them so they must learn to stand up for themselves (she had never been physical with them)
2. She is my neice. Besides my mom my husband and I have been the only stability she has ever had in her life and I will not give up on her just because of unpleasant behavior.

I was just looking to vent, because I was very frustrated. I feel better now and she is being very pleasant and sweet. It is just touch and go with her.

Quoting ////////////:" She is eight. I WILL NOT cut her out of out lives because she doesn't behave well for two reasons 1. ... [snip!] ... because I was very frustrated. I feel better now and she is being very pleasant and sweet. It is just touch and go with her."

I would never cut her out either...thats just wrong on so many levels. My daughter was like that at 8. For some reason I though she was like more about 6 lol. Sounded like a 6 yr old to me. But I was close. Well good luck.

Thanks!!