Once a cheater...

I believe in the saying, "Once a cheater, always a cheater..." and it's hard for me to trust. I know people can change, I'm completely aware of that, but how many times can someone mess up before they've had too many chances and it's just time to let go?? How come I get in trouble if I question...because I had to find out from other people what was going on the first TWO times...and how do I believe you won't mess up again when it's happened so many times already? I know I'm in this place in my life because I brought myself here...and I could have left a looooong time ago...but I didn't.

My worrying can't be a good thing. I'm sure it's hurting us more than helping...but I can't help but think something is going on.

guys suck.

Quoting Excited for #2!!:“ I believe in the saying, "Once a cheater, always a cheater..." and it's hard for me to trust. I know ... [snip!] ... worrying can't be a good thing. I'm sure it's hurting us more than helping...but I can't help but think something is going on.”

After two years of going through exactly what you're going through now, I was insane! I was so bitter. I hated everyone. I knocked him in the face a couple of times because of it. I had a journal full of all the hate and rage I felt towards him. Now that he's abandoned my child and I, it will be impossible for me to ever take him seriously if he gets in touch with me again. I see right through that ratty bastard, and I hate him.

Some people actually do learn and change, but if you wind up dating a crazy sociopath like I did...well, there's no hope.

Best of luck to you, sorry I sound so negative. There's just nothing I can say in his defense...guys are pigs.

i don't know your story, but I am a strong believer in once a cheater always a cheater. Guys can lie soooo good, trust me I know. I have never caught any of my bf's cheating, but i can tell you that my ex (father's daughter) is still calling me telling me he loves me and what not, and i just found out he is sorta talking w/ some 17 yr old girl...to me that is it. If he wanted to be w/ me, he would be trying to fix things, not trying to mess around w/ other people... If I KNEW my bf cheated on me, there is no way i could stay w/ him. I don't even ever want to talk to my ex again over this! Trust is a VERY hard thing to get back, and you may never get it back if he did cheat on you, and that alone will strain your relationship. Good luck hun!!

You realize if men were posting about how much women suck or how bitchy they are, the two of you who commented negatively about all men would probably throw a conniption fit, eh?

C.

no, shit i would agree with them

Quoting Gabriella's Momma:“ no, shit i would agree with them”

Hah, I would too.

Sometimes, I wish he would just leave me...leave us...because then at least I would know for sure what is going on...but instead, we don't get married because HE doesn't believe in marriage...but we don't break up, andcome August we'llhave 2 kids. He has been good for a long time, but he has been acting strange lately...and whenever I bring something up he gets really defensive and mad at ME...and here it is after 1am and he's still out with people he's been known to be bad with...I am just getting to the point where I need something certain in my life...and I don't feel like I am getting what I need...and this is the only place I could turn...pretty sad, huh?

Sure, "men are pigs", but when they talk shit about other women "I agree with them".

So, doesn't that make you pigs, too?

C.

Quoting Excited for #2!!:“ Sometimes, I wish he would just leave me...leave us...because then at least I would know for sure what ... [snip!] ... in my life...and I don't feel like I am getting what I need...and this is the only place I could turn...pretty sad, huh?”

I personally think that you should take care of your children and yourself first. Men come later. They're less important. It seems like your boyfriend has done his part by giving you two wonderful children..and I personally think that if you want something more and he's not doing it for you, well, you should leave him. I'm really not trying to tell you what to do. Men are just notorious for pretending, and unfortunately, we rarely ever fall hardest for the good ones. The journey to recovery is a long one, but the ladies who made it are damn sure glad they did. I know I am.

My friend has a son .. her boyfriend cheated on her once. She trusted him to change and he has not cheated on her since. And my husband is his good friend would NEVER lie for him. My husband is Christian and doesn't believe in cheating and such in fact finds it disgusting. So I don't believe the once a cheater always a cheater thing.

Quoting God:“ Sure, "men are pigs", but when they talk shit about other women "I agree with them". So, doesn't that make you pigs, too? C.”

Technically, yes. I was going to repost rephrasing the statement..but then I didn't. lol
*Most* guys are pigs. I can't actually confirm that there are any good ones, because I certainly haven't met any.

Quoting Lilly89:“ Technically, yes. I was going to repost rephrasing the statement..but then I didn't. lol *Most* guys ... [snip!] ... didn't. lol *Most* guys are pigs. I can't actually confirm that there are any good ones, because I certainly haven't met any.”

Yeah, sadly it seems that way sometimes.

There are lots of good ones in Canada.

heh

C.

Quoting God:“ Yeah, sadly it seems that way sometimes. There are lots of good ones in Canada. heh C.”

Well damn, I hate being American. ;P

Quoting God:“ Yeah, sadly it seems that way sometimes. There are lots of good ones in Canada. heh C.”

Oh, Canada!! I'm on my way ;)