Forums > Abortion Survivorsby: NICKEL☮POLIS

I'm sorry baby.

posted 25th May '12
I'm sorry that you never got the chance to know your mommy and daddy and sister. Never got kisses or cuddles or told how much you were loved. I'm sorry that Ellie gets to grow up and you don't. I'm sorry that when people ask me about my children, I don't acknowledge you, even though I want to. Even though you're still my baby, and when I think of my children, I think of you. My baby that didn't even get a chance, because I didn't let you.
Bleh, I don't know why I feel like crap today. Next month it's been four years since my abortion, and I haven't spent this much time dwelling on it in a long time. Having DD makes me feel different about everything. Being a mom gives me a whole other point of view. I'm still pro choice, but before I had DD pro lifers really bugged me. Now that I am a parent, I get it.
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I'm due September 29th (a girl), have 1 child & 1 angel baby & live in Ontario
posted 25th May '12
Huge hug. RIP little one.
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I have 15 kids & 8 angel babies & live in Charles City, Iowa
posted 25th May '12
I'm sorry, i read your story before, and was literally in tears, i couldn't imagine. I've had two abortions, one at 9 wks and one at 13 wks, and both i had after my three year old, because i wasn't careful, the first one sent me into a deep depression, drugs and alcohol, it was bad. I had to learn to forgive myself, and remember that i had to do it for my life, and my daughters life. I wasn't capable of taking care of another child. The second one, i didn't want to, but the father was a complete smurf to me and not supportive at all, i felt selfish for getting another abortion just because the father didn't want it, and didn't want me, i didn't want another baby with someone i knew i wasn't going to be with, and i still to this day feel terrible about it, but i KNOW i made the right decisions. I hope you feel better sweetie <3
quotesmurfs?
I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in New York
posted 25th May '12
<3
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I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Clearwater, Florida
posted 25th May '12
Quoting NIC☮LE:" I'm sorry that you never got the chance to know your mommy and daddy and sister. Never got kisses or ... [snip!] ... other point of view. I'm still pro choice, but before I had DD pro lifers really bugged me. Now that I am a parent, I get it."

You took the words I say to myself right out of my mouth!

I had my abortion 5 years ago last October, I was 6 weeks along. I found out November 1st that I was almost 8 weeks pregnant exactly 5 years later and same due date. I cant say I regret my decision because it was the only one I could make at the time, but I do talk and pray to my baby every night. I am about to have this little girl any week now and I feel so blessed, like she is a gift from the baby I had to let go.

I have a cluster of star tattoos on my left shoulder,5 smaller ones for my pets, 3 large ones for myself, DH and stepson. After Amelia is born I am adding another large one and then on my right shoulder I am having a vine with a single forget me knot on it to remember my baby I couldn't have, I will never forget and never stop loving him/her
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I'm due June 17th (a girl), have 1 child & 1 angel baby & live in California
posted 26th May '12
I had one about 6 years ago bc I was young and stupid and not ready to be a parent. Then about a year after that, I was told that I wouldn't be able to have children bc of non-abortion related feminine problems. I thought I had lost my only chance to ever be a parent and I hated myself for a long time for it. Eventually, I learned to forgive myself and realized that what I did was the right choice for me at the time. Now here I am, 4 years after they told me I wouldn't have kids, and I'm pregnant with my first child. Proved the doctors wrong... My point is, you have to learn to forgive yourself before you can heal. Emotionally, physically, mentally... At all.
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I'm due November 14th (a girl), have 1 angel baby & live in Danville, Arkansas
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