SO confused... Baby daddy delimma

How does a toddler deal with parents seperating?
What is He thinking?
Why is he like this?

my fiancee and i seperated a few months ago and it has changed my children a lot. my son has become more agressive and angry (he's 15 months) and my daughter...well she just seems to be quite fussy all the time. she talks about her daddy all the time and how she wants to see him. and things just suck... i had a very good reason for leaving him. but anyways, he sees the kids once in a while but it isn't on a regular basis and i know it bothers my kids. my daughter asks me everyday if she is going to be able to go to daddy's house. when i tell her no not today, her little heart gets broken. and it happens almost everyday. she seems very sad all of the time now. she really misses him.... but he doesn't want to see them that often ... only when its beneficial to him. like when he has NOTHING else to do and its in the evening so they go to bed after only a few hours. i don't understand it becuase when he was in our home he was the best father a child could ask for. he was very family oriented and would take the kids to the park when i was working or take them shopping and he was just great. he did everything in the world for them and he was soooo affectionate with them. he was always kissing on them and loving on them, he didn't go out with friends, he didn't playon the computer or anything. he spent all his free time on the floor with the kids,playing....and now, i'm lucky if he calls and asks about them the only time he sees them is when I call HIM. and when he gets mad, he talks about leaving and never seeing the kids again and i wonder if he really feels that way. has anyone else been through this?

Quoting Shay:“ How does a toddler deal with parents seperating? What is He thinking? Why is he like this? my fiancee ... [snip!] ... about leaving and never seeing the kids again and i wonder if he really feels that way. has anyone else been through this?”

sounds like he is trying to punish you for leaving him.... Now its harder on you because the kids are sad. I would def. make a time every week that the kids see him that way they know that they know where and when they get to see daddy. Sit down and have a talk with him once the kids are in bed and see if you can come up with something if not you may have to go to court to get something more stable for the kids...My kids love predictability if things change they get a little sooky and angry so the sooner you get things on a schedule the better it will be fore them and things might start to seetle down a bit...I am sorry you are going through this it must be heartbreaking to see your kids so sad when you cant do anything for them.   

i've tried to do that... he refuses to do that.. and he says that if i take it to court he's leaving the state. and the kids really wont get to see their daddy then. one reason i left him is becuase he was controlling. i mean very. he once told me that if i allowed him to call me names (like whore and slut and bitch) he would let me see my friends. and when he would want me to have sex with him he would be sweet and i would and then he would start calling me his exs names and asking me if i liked it.. its a huge mess and i don't want to explain everything. but thats a small part of the reason i finally left him. i just dont know what to do. i don't see how he could be such a wonderful father at one point in time and then be like this . i don't get it. and i don't know what to tell my children. they didnt see the bad things that i did to him, so they think that i just kicked their daddy out for no reason and my daughter has actually told me she hates me for making daddy leave. and she is only two...

I'm going through the same thing kind of, my boyfriend/father of my children just split last week. Luckily our son gets to seem him almost everday. At first he was upset that daddy wasn't home when he woke up in the morning (he works nights) but now he is getting use to him not being there. He still calls where we live daddy's home even though we've explained to him that daddy doesn't live there anymore. I think that it helps that he gets to see his daddy almost everyday. The other one isn't born yet so I don't have to go through this with him. I'm sorry that your kids dad doesn't seem intrested in them anymore, that is heartbreaking. The best thing to do is try and explain to them what is going on and just let them go through the process of daddy not being there.