re: What to do when the love is gone.
posted 3rd May
Quoting Baby♥Love:“ Well, Im coming to the realization that my pregnancy was for all the wrong reasons. Dont get me wrong ... [snip!] ... but I think are relationship wasnt so strong to start out with. My son was planned, which makes me feel like more of a failure.”
I have 1 child & live in Louisiana
628 postsposted 4th May
Quoting brianamarie21:“ Another fight today.....I told him Im done. I took his phone since it's in my name and wouldn't give ... [snip!] ... up I just wish he had a different dad or I wish I could win the lottery or something so I could leave and be fine on my own.”
Aw I'm sorry. It is so hard to watch them pretend like nothing is wrong. Maybe this will shake him up a bit/ knowing you will finally make him leave. What about your parents? I know alot of people dont have the option I do, my mothers a stay at home momma so shes always home. Reading your post made me realize this is going to be my future, because nothing is going to change.. He is actually saying "I know your going to leave me".. and " Your gonna leave me someday", I certainly dont want him to feel insecure about our relationship, becuase the only person who can take me away from him is himself. But if he doesnt start acting like an adult, and someone in a loving, commited relationship then I really cant go on. Im sorry you dont have a job right now that would take so much stress off the situation. I wish you werent going through this its hard to put on a smile for everyone and the kids. But you cant go on feeling un appreciated it will only make you angry, and hatefull and thats what he needs to step up and realize, the longer things go unsaid the worse they will get. Sorry I didnt get to respond until today, im remodling half my house and my shit head boyfriend doesnt come by to help my dad out so I just do little things for him all day long . Keep posting in here so we can chat, I would love to help in anyway I can. I hope you know that I understand what you are going through and my heart does go out to you. I know that never helps but Im here.
I'm due June 30th (a boy) & live in Massachusetts
4767 postsposted 5th May
Quoting Baby♥Love:“ Aw I'm sorry. It is so hard to watch them pretend like nothing is wrong. Maybe this will shake him up ... [snip!] ... you know that I understand what you are going through and my heart does go out to you. I know that never helps but Im here.”
Thanks! I hope things work out between the two of you. As of now we are not fighting. I told him the next fight or if another week goes by like the past one I am done and no questions asked or no discussing things. My mom is living with us right now so just started getting disability and the past 5 yrs I have been supporting her which is stressful. My brother is staying here as well and them two really do nothing. I cook and clean. My brother wont even unload the dishwasher or take the garbage out. Because of that my bf says that he has been pushing me away because he can;t stand being here with them. Which I can't either. Now that my mom has income we are going to move out, that's what I have been planning the past few years. I think that will help our relationship out alittle. I just hope I am not making the wrong decisions, but I don't think I will really know until we try moving out without my mom or brother. And he thinks it would be good for me to just get a part time job for a few hours a week during the morning because he works 2nd shift. I think that will help also, this is the longest I have went without a job since I was 16 and first starting working. Keep me updated and I will do the same!
I have 2 kids & live in Minnesota
posted 5th May
Quoting brianamarie21:“ Thanks! I hope things work out between the two of you. As of now we are not fighting. I told him the ... [snip!] ... is the longest I have went without a job since I was 16 and first starting working. Keep me updated and I will do the same!”
Yeah, living with family is soo stressful! Good luck with moving and all that. And besides the extra income, working again will probablly brighting you up a bit, meeting new people and getting away from home a little more will be good for you. I live with my parents but there in there 50's now and my mother cant really do anything cleaning laundry wise, so I do all the cleaning around here and she cooks. But my dad just recently started helping out, taking the food shopping over so she doesnt over do it. My mother gets soo stressed when she even has to leave the house its crazy! .. As far as home life goes, its about as good as its ever been. And my whole guy situation im putting on the back burner. Im planning my shower which is in a week and a half, putting a car on the road and redoing my whole upstairs. Im gonna basically stick to myself so he gets the point that im distancing myself, maybe he'll smarten up. Good luck with you and your guy..& yes keep me updated ill do the same
I'm due June 30th (a boy) & live in Massachusetts
posted 7th May
Quoting Lil'l LJ:“ tough question.....was it bad prior to pregnancy and you feel that this was just a temporary band-aid ... [snip!] ... gone.....making me crazy..... PSOur sex life is like so non existent right now I say FIGHT it is what you want...”
I am going through something different. My two year old lives with us so I spend alot of time playing with her. He is jealous of her cause of that. Thats why I think he started getting all the late night calls, text messages all threw out the day. He once told me that we ended up together because I gave him alot of attention when we where dating . Now I dont give him as much so I think and kinda know that he has found someone else. Yes he takes care of all of my childs needs and mine because I dont work, but that does not mean cheat. I am waiting for the perfect day to let him know that I know about his other girl, I am still hurt. My heart wont let go of him. He was the first guy I dated after my daughter's dad and I split up and the first one that I trusted. Now we are having a child and I feel like I just wasted my time with him. I am happy to be blessed again, but this is not the way to bring kids into the world. I know he no longer loves me , I just cant let go. I told myself that after the baby comes I am leaving and never coming back, but I am scared. Im 25 two kids, no job, no friends, no life, and I am starting over. I must be crazy.
I have 1 child & live in Louisiana
posted 7th May
Quoting Loved One:“ I am going through something different. My two year old lives with us so I spend alot of time playing ... [snip!] ... and never coming back, but I am scared. Im 25 two kids, no job, no friends, no life, and I am starting over. I must be crazy.”
Aw, Im so sorry. I dont know how you never exploded about it. Dont hold it in your only going to hurt yourself. If attention is the issue then theres going to be less of that with a new baby. Maybe if you talk to him about it he will leave her, or if your past that point and dont even care then leave him. If I end up leaving my guy (which Im pretty sure im going to do after the baby is born) then I will be in the same spot, but I dont care. I know being jobless with kids is horriable but I'll learn to stand on my own and we'll make it. Try not to worry about the future and concentrate on the present. Its not fair to you that he goes somewhere else for love and affection and you shouldnt put up with that. Its so hard after you put all your trust into a man, and they just abuse it. You dont deserve to be unhappy ever, let alone right now knowing there is a little baby in there waiting to love you. I'll be here if you wanna talk.
I'm due June 30th (a boy) & live in Massachusetts
posted 7th May
Quoting Baby♥Love:“ Aw, Im so sorry. I dont know how you never exploded about it. Dont hold it in your only going to hurt ... [snip!] ... ever, let alone right now knowing there is a little baby in there waiting to love you. I'll be here if you wanna talk. ”
I am past talking and I don't even think I care that he has moved on. I feel like he could have been man enough to tell me. We live together he could at least said something. It had to been going on for a while cause we just got a bigger house I wish I would not have signed the papers with him. I know I have to leave I am just staying til the baby comes on saturday then I am taking my children, my car, my computer and the rest of my things and never looking back. Then he can move the next one in. I hope she is smart if not he will do the same to her. He has a child but is not allowed to see her because he is stupid now he has two he cant see. I would hate to be him.
I have 1 child & live in Louisiana
posted 7th May
Quoting Loved One:“ I am past talking and I don't even think I care that he has moved on. I feel like he could have been ... [snip!] ... to her. He has a child but is not allowed to see her because he is stupid now he has two he cant see. I would hate to be him.”
Good for you, stay strong. What a fuckin small petty man, your right he could have atleast said something to you. Good luck with the baby.. SATURDAY?? Thats awesome! I feel like I've been waiting forever. I have 7 weeks 5 days left. Your probably one of the strongest woman I've ever come into contact with. Good for you!
I'm due June 30th (a boy) & live in Massachusetts
8 postsposted 7th May
Quoting Lil'l LJ:“ tough question.....was it bad prior to pregnancy and you feel that this was just a temporary band-aid ... [snip!] ... gone.....making me crazy..... PSOur sex life is like so non existent right now I say FIGHT it is what you want...”WOW im going through the same thing with my boyfriend. this really helpd!
posted 7th May
We haven't had a fight in the past couple of days!! And we have been looking at apartments. He wants to move out June 1st because this certain company is offereing free rent for June! But then that is screwing my mom and brother over. They will have to pay my rent for June. I would still payJune's rent, but I don't have it and there is no way my bf will. So that kinda makes me want to start a fight, but we do everything for them and they need to learn to do shit on their own. Technically my mom owes me so much money it's not even funny, but she thinks I owe her the world. So hopefully our relationship keeps getting better and even better once we get our own place!
quoteI have 2 kids & live in Minnesota
posted 10th May
Quoting brianamarie21:“ We haven't had a fight in the past couple of days!! And we have been looking at apartments. He wants ... [snip!] ... she thinks I owe her the world. So hopefully our relationship keeps getting better and even better once we get our own place!”
Goood!!!! Im so glad to hear it, me and my guy fought Wed., but I decided to let it go for his birthday which was Thursday. So were still good
I'm due June 30th (a boy) & live in Massachusetts
posted 11th May
Quoting Baby♥Love:“ Good for you, stay strong. What a fuckin small petty man, your right he could have atleast said something ... [snip!] ... forever. I have 7 weeks 5 days left. Your probably one of the strongest woman I've ever come into contact with. Good for you!”
I actually had him on Thursday at 11:34 am. He was 7 lbs 5 onuces and 20 inches long. I never knew that contractions hurt like that. If I ever have another child I will ask for the drugs. As far as the pain in my life, he is acting like he cares about me and my child, but Im not stupid. He dnt even want to get up in the middle of the nite to get the baby. What kind of crap is that, but as soon as I can get a doctors ok that I can travel, I gone. I nt even letting him know. I think he knows that I am tired of something but he cant get it. Well gotta go feeding time. Good luck in 7 weeks. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY
I have 1 child & live in Louisiana
posted 11th May
Quoting Loved One:“ I actually had him on Thursday at 11:34 am. He was 7 lbs 5 onuces and 20 inches long. I never knew that ... [snip!] ... he knows that I am tired of something but he cant get it. Well gotta go feeding time. Good luck in 7 weeks. HAPPY MOTHERS DAY”
Happy Mothers Day to you!!Congrats. on the baby!
As for my mothers day it sucked, and I broke up with him. He worked today, promised he wouldnt Saturday to help with my room becuase if he doesnt Im going to and im 8 months pregnant I shouldnt be doing that. He doesnt even care. Also I was sitting on my deck, and I heard a screch and thought it was just the kids in the woods, and then comes running out my cat, oh god did I flip out. Instantly when I saw my cat running I screamed are you fucking kidding me, and continued swearing my ass off till I made my way through the woods to there backyard. There stupid father comes out and says I appreciate the language I said ya I appreciate your fucking kids abusing my cat, I was like im 8 months pregnant you think I appreciate that, he says HE UNDERSTANDS. Yeah bullshit, have the day I had from hell and tell me you understand then. He then looks at his little shitty kids and asks if they did it, of course they deny it and I said I dont have time for this and just walked away. I wanted to killll someone!!! I felt so bad for my cat hes the sweetest cat and he would walk up to any. Ugh today was horriable how was your first mothers day with the babe?
I'm due June 30th (a boy) & live in Massachusetts
1531 postsposted 12th May
Quoting Baby♥Love:“ okay well this is last resort. I dont know what to do anymore and Im just curious, what would you ladies do... Let a fading relationship die, or keep fighting for it, even if its only you fighting?”I would have held off on any major decisions until after the baby is born. I was so hormonal when I was pregnant. In my situation, it was definitely worth fighting. My marriage is not perfect, no marriage is, but we do truly love each other. Plus our daughter was a 'surprise' and that had a lot to do with our constant arguing. But we have survived and will be celebrating 3 years of marriage soon! Good luck!
I have 1 child & live in Maryland
posted 12th May
Quoting Cassie's Taxi:“ I would have held off on any major decisions until after the baby is born. I was so hormonal when I was ... [snip!] ... had a lot to do with our constant arguing. But we have survived and will be celebrating 3 years of marriage soon! Good luck!”
Awww congrats! I noticed you posted with the first topic I wrote about.. If you go to the last page you can read about how he ruined my mothers day... I left him, he is not worth it at all. Hes horriable... No one could fully understand what he puts me through, and I dont have enough time in the world to talk about everything he has done to me.. Im just over it. Now hes saying he hopes he never sees our son, real nice for a 29 year old man to say!
I'm due June 30th (a boy) & live in Massachusetts
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