re: I have to get it out.. TMI and super long.

Quoting PBrittany:" Your such a strong person, you touched my heart when i was reading this..ive never had the same physical ... [snip!] ... things no one should go through, no one at all.. your a very brave woman to post that up.. i hope you stay strong for your son"

Steven, the guy that was so mean. There is so much more to the story with him. I left this out but probably the worst thing he had ever done to me is when he told his friend if he paid him 35$ he could have sex with me at the same time as him. The guy's name was Jeff. and his girlfriend was my friend. I cried the entire time. Jeff said that he didn't know that but he did. He heard me. and Steven had just downed a mountain dew bottle of whiskey and was pushing me around. There was no saying no for me that day. That's why sex sometimes is so hard for me today.. Because sometimes I actually associate sex for love because every single guy I've ever been with sexually told me that they did it because they loved me or blahblahblah.. My SO is the first man in my life that has NEVER taken advantage of me sexually.

Quoting PBrittany:" Your such a strong person, you touched my heart when i was reading this..ive never had the same physical ... [snip!] ... things no one should go through, no one at all.. your a very brave woman to post that up.. i hope you stay strong for your son"

Steven, the guy that was so mean. There is so much more to the story with him. I left this out but probably the worst thing he had ever done to me is when he told his friend if he paid him 35$ he could have sex with me at the same time as him. The guy's name was Jeff. and his girlfriend was my friend. I cried the entire time. Jeff said that he didn't know that but he did. He heard me. and Steven had just downed a mountain dew bottle of whiskey and was pushing me around. There was no saying no for me that day. That's why sex sometimes is so hard for me today.. Because sometimes I actually associate sex for love because every single guy I've ever been with sexually told me that they did it because they loved me or blahblahblah.. My SO is the first man in my life that has NEVER taken advantage of me sexually.

Quoting Hailee(::" Steven, the guy that was so mean. There is so much more to the story with him. I left this out but ... [snip!] ... it because they loved me or blahblahblah.. My SO is the first man in my life that has NEVER taken advantage of me sexually. "

Most guys are just full of smurf i hate when thats their main priority.. sex sex sex they want it with whoever and try to get it however they can, it makes me sick.. but i totally get you when you say its sex is hard for you, to me it doesnt feel right just to give it to anyone and for you to go through everything you have, its hard to find the right one and to feel comfortable and at ease.. dont ever let anyone take an advantage of you, just because your a woman and men are much stronger, us woman can be even more stronger,, just stay strong and put your foot down when its necessary

Quoting PBrittany:" Most guys are just full of smurf i hate when thats their main priority.. sex sex sex they want it with ... [snip!] ... and men are much stronger, us woman can be even more stronger,, just stay strong and put your foot down when its necessary"

yeah I know what you mean! about the strength. It always felt like no matter my might I used he always was stronger. It was until I reached that point and all my rage came out. When I hit that point people have told me my eyes turn black, and there is no getting me out of it until I have gotten the rage out.

Quoting Hailee(::" yeah I know what you mean! about the strength. It always felt like no matter my might I used he always ... [snip!] ... hit that point people have told me my eyes turn black, and there is no getting me out of it until I have gotten the rage out. "

Yup, when you have all that anger lots can happen... i saw the picture of your son, hes so adorable (:

Quoting PBrittany:" Yup, when you have all that anger lots can happen... i saw the picture of your son, hes so adorable (:"

yeahh, but its so rare that it happens! aww and thank you (: He is my little cutie! I love that little boy so much! he is the coolest little dude ever!

Quoting Hailee(::" yeahh, but its so rare that it happens! aww and thank you (: He is my little cutie! I love that little boy so much! he is the coolest little dude ever!"

yeahh i know..
He looks like a very happy active boy (: hows he doing?

Quoting PBrittany:" yeahh i know.. He looks like a very happy active boy (: hows he doing?"

He is wonderful. Just starting to hit his terrible two's. hehe. Today he was being very ornery. then he wouldn't let me put him down (which I don't mind lol) but he is just sleeping away (:

Quoting Hailee(::" He is wonderful. Just starting to hit his terrible two's. hehe. Today he was being very ornery. then he wouldn't let me put him down (which I don't mind lol) but he is just sleeping away (:"

aww hes twoo! thats cute, i hope your little family is going good

Wow you are a strong and brave woman! You're story gave me chills and I'm so sorry that you had to experience things like that. Just know that not all men are animals, and hopefully with time you will heal. Hope the best for your future and you have a beautiful little boy.  

Can't believe that was your life.
I am so sorry for how they treated you. I pray for you strength and happiness.

Quoting Kid Blacky™:" All I can say is....OMG."

yes exactly

Lady.... I just read this.... I am so sorry you had to go through this, and in reading the comments afterward, I am soooo overjoyed you finally found someone to prove yourself wrong, to prove that men are not all the same. I'm still looking for that "one." I admire and applaud your strength.