re: I have to get it out.. TMI and super long.

My heart breaks for you and all you've been through.

I hope that you find the strength to be happy and move on.

You are inspiring.

I think that all of your responses have made me cry more than writing this did! Unbelievable, but true. I have never felt this way about myself. And when I think about my decision to take the pill and that it's the right thing for my health emotionally and physically, I think that I can never get through this. But writing this showed me that I can get through it. Hell I got through so much already. I can not thank you mommas enough for the kind words!!!

omg! That was so beautifully written. You had me pulled in. I am so sorry you went through that. NO ONE should ever have to be sucked in to such a mess. You were so young and everyone got the best of you. They didnt! Your baby boy did. You are so strong. I admire you in so many ways! I hope you feel a bit better after letting this all out. If you have doubts about taking the pill then think about it a bit more, if you feel its best then so be it. I hope you are at peace with what ever choice you make.

Quoting The Fantastic 4:" omg! That was so beautifully written. You had me pulled in. I am so sorry you went through that. NO ONE ... [snip!] ... then think about it a bit more, if you feel its best then so be it. I hope you are at peace with what ever choice you make. "

I am at peace. If you read my other post.. it's kind of my only option. My DR told me that there are possibilities that I don't make it out of this pregnancy.

Quoting Hailee(::" I am at peace. If you read my other post.. it's kind of my only option. My DR told me that there are possibilities that I don't make it out of this pregnancy."

you gotta do what is right for you and what will be best.

Quoting Hailee(::" I am at peace. If you read my other post.. it's kind of my only option. My DR told me that there are possibilities that I don't make it out of this pregnancy."

I just did! So sorry about whats going on. It is whats best and your boy needs you. You are so mature and strong!

Wow mama. Big hugs. Your strength is very admirable..

this should have never happen to you nor anyone else but it does. and in no kind of way or form should you feel guilty. none of it was your fault. but the fault of others horrible descions. i cant imagine half of what you go through but do know you are a strong person and even stronger for letting it all out which may be what you needed to just let it all out. but through all that bad you got a tiny blessing. that you can raise to never in anyway act like these people. hes yours to love to shape and watch grow. im sorry you had to go through this again no one should. but what dosent kill you makes you stronger.. consider seeing someone. sometimes having someone like a random stranger to talk to and vent to helps you dont have to feel like the closest people to you are judging you. when im sure there not but you cant help feeling that way. i hope the best for you in life. and that the rest of it is great

wow this was so moving i actually cried thank you so much for sharing your story i hope you can find some peace now that its all on the table..

thanks to the few who just replied. I planned on deleting it. But I had a momma PM me and tell me that it might be best to leave it up for others who could be going through my situation. And if I can help another young girl than i know that everything I went through was so worth it. Thanks again guys!

what an inspiration for others to have the confidence to not only tell their stories but not to be afraid of telling there stories there are alot of us who care about this and think its absolutely amazing that your strong and praise you because of so much strength you have in writing your stories and try to find ways to help put this in the past and move forward...You have a great future ahead of you and don't let anyone say other wise. You can do because you already have done it...
You are a very strong woman and im positive a great mother...

Thank you for sharing <3

you have overwhelming strength that i couldnt imagine. I admire ur will to survive after all that craziness.. Im not good with advice but seeing as how typing/writing it helps u i would say u should see a professional, to get the good productive help that u want/need. Im the type i can write what i feel in a notebook and hide it away so no one sees it and it helps. No one can betray my trust that way cuz its a notebook, ya know? I could say it a million times ur strength amazes me. And outstanding job on quiting the drugs and destructive lifestyle... Your baby boy is God's way of showing u there is a silver lining. Good luck and stay strong

Your such a strong person, you touched my heart when i was reading this..ive never had the same physical contact butt ive been close, i was pushed in a room by two other guys they told me i had to sleep with there brother it was horrible i was 14 or something i was still a virgin but they finally let me go nothing happened i started to cry, the other time my uncle started touching me the day after a hurricane we went to see if his lights were on and thats when he tried to.. but you, you had things no one should go through, no one at all.. your a very brave woman to post that up.. i hope you stay strong for your son

You are a way stronger woman than I could ever be. I was abused by my mom's ex husband from the time I can remember (maybe 6 to 8ish) until we moved out when I was 12. I was so scared that I didn't tell anyone until my mom almost took him back. I told her it was him or me, I wasn't going back. I'm now almost 23 and still have flash backs and memories of it happening. I'm now married to my best friend, he was there through everything, the only "boy" I'd talk to when I was younger. We've been married for almost 5 years and have two little girls with a little one on the way. The things that happened in our past is what made us who we are today. Don't ever doubt yourself or feel like it was your fault, because it's NEVER our fault!!!! My heart is with you so much. The best thing that happened is that adorable little boy in your picture. Having my babies is how I get through my day. Stay strong sweetie, that's all we can do.

Quoting PBrittany:" Your such a strong person, you touched my heart when i was reading this..ive never had the same physical ... [snip!] ... things no one should go through, no one at all.. your a very brave woman to post that up.. i hope you stay strong for your son"

Steven, the guy that was so mean. There is so much more to the story with him. I left this out but probably the worst thing he had ever done to me is when he told his friend if he paid him 35$ he could have sex with me at the same time as him. The guy's name was Jeff. and his girlfriend was my friend. I cried the entire time. Jeff said that he didn't know that but he did. He heard me. and Steven had just downed a mountain dew bottle of whiskey and was pushing me around. There was no saying no for me that day. That's why sex sometimes is so hard for me today.. Because sometimes I actually associate sex for love because every single guy I've ever been with sexually told me that they did it because they loved me or blahblahblah.. My SO is the first man in my life that has NEVER taken advantage of me sexually.