abortion support

so i have an appointment for an abortion tomorrow.
I am sure i dont want this baby, but ive posted before on this account that its odd because just a few years ago i considered myself pro-life, and the end of any baby/fetus/whatever life was senseless to me.

for some reason i dont feel any of that. i dont feel attached to this baby, i dont feel that it deserves a chance, most of the emotion i know abortion survivors feel i am not facing at all. its almost like im not pregnant at all. i carry on my day like nothing.

there are several people at my work having kids, sharing videos of their moving bellies, talking about names, etc, asking when im going to have another one, asking me about my pregnancy (i havent shared that im pregnant again) and all sorts of things.
and i swear i am the best actor in the world all of a sudden. it doesnt phase me one damn bit, i can talk about it, joke about it, everything. i kinda feel like that under cover cop from the departed. straight faced but there is so much going on underneath, i guess.


its just odd to me. is this normal?
when i get home, i get depressed. i haven't cried or anything, i just dont want to do anything. sometimes if i think about it i feel like im drowning.

i kinda want to get a second job just to stay busy. like...i need to stay busy.



all im asking i guess, are these signs that its all going to fall apart later? that after the fact im going to be in a very bad place?
has anyone ever felt like this before?

if i were you, i'd check into seeing a therapist

You could fall apart later. I recommend talking to someone. Even just once or twice. Get it all out.

Quoting BG Secrets:" so i have an appointment for an abortion tomorrow. I am sure i dont want this baby, but ive posted before ... [snip!] ... all going to fall apart later? that after the fact im going to be in a very bad place? has anyone ever felt like this before?"

I dont know. Its unusual, but maybe its just really cut and dry for you, that you dont want this child and arent going to have it.

Sounds like your touching depression. You really should seek some help & fast, your about to go through a serious event in your life which will likely make everything worse if you do not handle it properly. Seek help. talk about how you feel, tell your doctor, find the path back to being real and not hiding behind a fake smile and a false laugh. I hope no matter what happens with you that life will give you blue sky's again soon, good luck X

To be honest if I were to need an abortion at some point I think I would be the same way. If I were pregnant and didn't want to be, I don't think I would have any qualms about ending the pregnancy and lying about it to your friends and coworkers is probably just a self preservation tactic, you don't want them to know and if they find out you know they will judge you.
I had a friend who got pregnant when we were young and she knew from the get go that she didnt want it so she got her abortion and never looked back. She is completely fine wih it and is now happily married with her first on the way. Maybe up just aren't gettin emotional because you know that isn't a baby inside you and it will never be one. I think you're fine.

Well I mean, if you are really feeling ok about it and not just putting on a show then no that does not mean everything will fall apart later, some woman are truly content with their decision and have no regrets or bad feelings about it like myself. If you think you're just acting then yes it will probably hit you hard later. You need to figure out which one it is so you can deal with it. If you're asking if its bad that you dont FEEL bad then no its not.

In your previous post, you said you already had it done.  

Quoting mamatwoboys:" In your previous post, you said you already had it done.   "

Do you know how BG secrets works? It's open for ALL members to use to talk about stuff they can't talk about under thier real names

Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" Do you know how BG secrets works? It's open for ALL members to use to talk about stuff they can't talk about under thier real names"

Oh I didn't know about that!  

Quoting mamatwoboys:" Oh I didn't know about that!  "

it's okay, not eveyone does.

You can find out more about this account in the Creation Station.

I don't find it odd at all, I have always desided wether or not I want a pregnancy before being attached to the fetus inside me, I'm not that emotional, and I don't get attached to things or people easly. it seems pretty cut and dry to me, don't want it so you arn't having it, tho there are 6 weeks after you may be emotional because of hormons, you may want to talk to someone during that time

hmm I dont find it all that odd. I had an abortion years and years ago and it didnt affect me at all. I never really cared. I never even felt "pregnant" really. After the abortion I felt a HUGE sense of relief, and thats it.
Its been like 8 years and I never even really think about it now. I was never sad or depressed or regretted my decision at all.