Forums > Abortion SurvivorsPage 1 2by: BG Secrets

I feel horrible

posted 27th Feb '12
I have always claimed to be pro-life but while I was pregnant I tried to "induce miscarriage" without actually going to a clinic and having an abortion.
Well now I think that I might be pregnant again and I don't know what I will do if I am. I barely can afford a pot to piss in right now.
I had sex between the 8th and 10th of this month with a condom and my period has not come yet but I also have been very stressed out lately.
I don't know what I will do. I don't want to carry this man's baby, but I feel like if I do go and have an abortion that I will never be able to forgive myself, and I know that my family will disown me.
I just feel like a horrible person.  
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I live in Arizona
account removed
posted 27th Feb '12
First of all, you're not horrible if you do choose to have an abortion. I used to be pro-life, as I am Christian, but I am now pro-choice, still Christian. But please don't try to self-induce a misscarraige, that is dangerous to you and the baby. Right now just take a couple breaths, KNOW that if you choose abortion you are NOT a horrible person at all. A lot of women choose abortion. They have counselling you can get to help afterwards. I am really sorry you are going through this situation  
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I have 2 kids & live in Indiana
posted 27th Feb '12
I'm sorry you're in this situation hun, but you're not a horrible person, and you can't take care of somebody else if you can't take care of yourself ya know?

Personally, I wouldn't tell my family and go to therapy afterwards to deal with the emotions of an abortion. I always thought I was pro-life as well, until I was close to a similar spot as you.
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I have 1 child & 1 angel baby & live in New Mexico
posted 27th Feb '12
Quoting Mya & Josie:" First of all, you're not horrible if you do choose to have an abortion. I used to be pro-life, as I am ... [snip!] ... abortion. They have counselling you can get to help afterwards. I am really sorry you are going through this situation  "

I'm christian also, and my family is "devout". I did not want to keep my current child but I was young and my parents forced me to keep it and now I'm wondering if I made the right choice or not. I'm going to be barely getting by once I get away from my parents..
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I live in Arizona
account removed
posted 27th Feb '12
Quoting Whozit:" You don't have to tell anyone about an abortion. That's part of the beauty of it."

  

This is true.
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I have 2 kids & live in Indiana
posted 27th Feb '12
Quoting Whozit:" You don't have to tell anyone about an abortion. That's part of the beauty of it."

How will I be able to pay for it?
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I live in Arizona
account removed
posted 27th Feb '12
Quoting BG Secrets:" How will I be able to pay for it?"

Some places offer assistance, you may have to check around.
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I have 2 kids & live in Indiana
posted 27th Feb '12
Quoting Whozit:" Personally I'd ask the father to pay for half, if not all of it. If he's unwilling, remind him that the alternative is paying 18 year's worth of child support."

I don't think he would.. he doesn't even have a job right now and with his last pregnancy scare he wanted the girl to keep the baby.. but I really don't want to.
Also if I ask him if he would pay for it he would probably tell someone and I don't want people to find out.. I'm so mortified right now.
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I live in Arizona
posted 27th Feb '12
OP, there is a sitcky in AS about abortion funding. If you wanted to PM me your location, I can try to help (I'm the OP of the funding thread).

This is YOUR choice. If you do feel like you can continue with a pregnancy, if you are pregnant, than only you can make this choice. I will say that it is even harder to straighten your life out with one more child. But I am sure that whichever way you decide, you will be figure out how to get by.

Something that has made me change the way I view abortion is the fact that at the time when most abortions are performed (<9 weeks) the fetus is smaller than a grape.

Right now, just breath, relax and wait until you can test. Go from there. Best of luck!
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I have 2 kids & live in Oklahoma
posted 28th Feb '12
If you chose to get an abortion your family doesn't have to know. It's your business. Make what choice you think you need to make for you, if you are pregnant.
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I have 1 child & live in St Marys, Georgia
this post has been hidden view anyway
posted 28th Feb '12
Ok I honestly have no clue why my post was modded out. I was not being mean or judgmental. All I asked was if she considered adoption, as that is another option. I was not being intolerant at all nor looking down on her. She just seems to be having a hard time with the idea of Abortion and seems to feel there is no other choice. Does she not have the right to see what other choices there are out there? Seriously if I get modded for posting something like that that is lame. I was posting something kind and caring  
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I have 3 kids & 2 angel babies & live in Marysville, Washington
posted 28th Feb '12
<blockquote><b>Quoting Bunnintheoven:</b>" Ok I honestly have no clue why my post was modded out. I was not being mean or judgmental. All I asked ... [snip!] ... out there? Seriously if I get modded for posting something like that that is lame. I was posting something kind and caring  "</blockquote>



I was going to say the same. You could always let some adopt the baby and let it have a good home. And no I'm not putting you down either. And your not a horrible person. It's just there is alot of ppl who can't have babies. So why not before you make a decision look some things up on choices. And if you do keep the baby there is always help until you can get one your feet. And there is plunty of gay couples who want a baby including two of my friends. So weigh out ur options before jumping on something and not knowing how it will effect you. Good luck hope you can fighure things out. And wish for the best
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I live in West Virginia
posted 28th Feb '12
Quoting pinklover11:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Bunnintheoven:</b>" Ok I honestly have no clue why my post was ... [snip!] ... jumping on something and not knowing how it will effect you. Good luck hope you can fighure things out. And wish for the best"
AGREE!!!
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I have 3 kids & 2 angel babies & live in Marysville, Washington
posted 1st Mar '12
Before you have an abortion , just make sure it's something you will be able to handle . It is not easy by any means , even if you know for a fact its what you want .
And as for you , You are NOT horrible . You're a woman in a rough spot in life , but regardless of your choices you will make it .
I'm not trying to condone lying , but sometimes it's what you need to do (if you chose abortion) , it might just be easier to tell your family you had a miscarriage just to avoid negative comments , because you obviously know this isn't easy to go through , and their comments would probably hurt more .
Or you should try talking to them and see what they say , sometimes family is more supportive than we think .
Anyways , good luck . I hope no matter what you choose , it's the best choice for you .
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