Forums > Health & Well-BeingPage 1 <> 17by: Devil's Advocate

re: Abusive Relationship Support

posted 31st Dec '11
Quoting mommy to 3 little monster:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Devil's Advocate:</b>" Unfortunately that would have to be ... [snip!] ... they will be removed."</blockquote> who is mara? To bad their isn't a anonymous account for all the users to use."

It is because we typically have trolls using the same IP address to make multiple accounts. It's the way the site works.
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I have 1 child & live in Beverly Hills, California
posted 31st Dec '11
<blockquote><b>Quoting Devil's Advocate:</b>" It is because we typically have trolls using the same IP address to make multiple accounts. It's the way the site works."</blockquote>



Oh ok got it, thats sad that others have to ruin it for the rest.
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I'm due June 21st (a girl), have 3 kids & live in Nevada
account removed
posted 2nd Jan '12
<blockquote><b>Quoting mommy to 3 little monster:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Devil's Advocate:</b>" Unfortunately that would have to be ... [snip!] ... they will be removed."</blockquote> who is mara? To bad their isn't a anonymous account for all the users to use."</blockquote>




That would requirer more coding and I can tell you right now that it wouldn't be on top of the list of things they already are working on.
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I'm TTC since January '01 & live in Japan
posted 5th Jan '12
Quoting ♥ Bea ♥:" Then you wont leave. Plain and simple. But you can't expect people to help you if you don't want the help."




i dont want to feel like im being judged for NOT leaving, and thats exactly how this particular post made me feel, and i do not need someone to convince me to leave- i know how it goes, and even though i may be "in denial"
the fact of the matter is im not READY to leave, if/when im ready i will, but it has to be a decision i make for myself, not what im feeling pressured to do, i came here because i wanted to be able to get my feelings out and just vent, not to be told im stupid for staying.
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I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Odessa, Texas
account removed
posted 5th Jan '12
Quoting *Bradley&NataliesMommy*:" i dont want to feel like im being judged for NOT leaving, and thats exactly how this particular post ... [snip!] ... to do, i came here because i wanted to be able to get my feelings out and just vent, not to be told im stupid for staying. "

Which is exactly what I'm telling you. I'm sorry but if you're not ready to leave then why do you need support? I honestly just don't understand I guess. Maybe I'm basing this off of my abuse but I didn't want support because I didn't tell anyone until I had left. I just can't support someone who is being abused and wont leave. So I guess what I'm trying to say in a nice way is that I think you're just looking for sympathy and I will not be the one who gives it to you. When you're ready adn you decide it's time to leave I'll be here but until then, no I'ms orry I can't be. I hope one of these other ladies can help you though. Sorry.

Bea
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I'm TTC since January '01 & live in Japan
posted 10th Jan '12
I cant explain it any other way except to say that i really dont want to leave, i want to find another option, i want to do whatever it takes to improve my marriage. I know its not common for people to change, i get it, but i also know that sometimes they do, and dont feel like its too late for that, and until im positive that it will never change, then i dont feel justified in leaving. I feel like its my job, my responsibility to my kids, and under the Vow i took, to never turn away from my husband, i made that promise before god and its not something i take lightly, and i feel like, for my children, i have to do whatever it takes to keep our family together.
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I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Odessa, Texas
posted 11th Jan '12
DELETED.
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I have 2 kids & live in North Carolina
posted 11th Jan '12
Quoting Kim Kardashian:" If i would of known this thread was here i would have been in it a while back. I am in a mentally, emotionally, ... [snip!] ... always come and get us. Please pray for me and pray that i get out tomorrow. This marriage is starting to get worse and worse."

I created it a while back, hoping that it would be a sticky like the child abuse and drug abuse threads but for some reason, it's a topic people are very uncomfortable talking about.
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I have 1 child & live in Beverly Hills, California
posted 11th Jan '12
DELETED.
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I have 2 kids & live in North Carolina
posted 11th Jan '12
Quoting Kim Kardashian:" I'm not uncomfortable with talking about it at all it gives me more courage to get the smurf out. I didn't ... [snip!] ... kids to have both parents but shouldn't I be happy too? ...I hope I didn't just sound selfish saying I wanted to be happy too."

You are more than welcome to join the thread and share your story. Maybe you can inspire some other ladies to seek help and we can get this thread stuck. I think this is a topic that needs attention.
quotesmurfs?
I have 1 child & live in Beverly Hills, California
posted 12th Jan '12
Quoting Devil's Advocate:" After seeing multiple posts lately from women in abusive relationships with nowhere to turn, I felt it ... [snip!] ... free to post your stories and seek help from the wonderful women on this site to do what is best for you in your situation."

i think that i MAY be in an abusive relationship. we argue alot, we have sex even though i dont want to. he is extremely jealous, always accusing me of cheating (which is my main reason for thinking this may not be normal). im scared to accept a compliment from a stranger because i feel like he will freak out on ME. i dont talk to our roommate unless he is around and even then only a few words so he doesnt think im trying to sleep with him. i try not to over react but i literally am scared most of the time. he always goes thru my phone asking who everyone is, who im texting, did i delete something, what me and my friends are talking about. i never see my friends, and when i do we argue about it cause he feels like my friends are bad influences. im miserable alot of the time.....


(brb. hes home now.)
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I have 1 child & 4 angel babies & live in Tallahassee, Florida
posted 12th Jan '12
Quoting Beanie's Breeder:" i think that i MAY be in an abusive relationship. we argue alot, we have sex even though i dont want ... [snip!] ... we argue about it cause he feels like my friends are bad influences. im miserable alot of the time..... (brb. hes home now.)"

I would call this abuse. It takes many different forms. I hope you can find some comfort from someone soon.
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I have 1 child & live in Beverly Hills, California
posted 12th Jan '12
Quoting Devil's Advocate:" I would call this abuse. It takes many different forms. I hope you can find some comfort from someone soon."


i am so stressed its crazy. i wanted to go to my best friends house, and he is friends with her bf. we were supposed to go do laundry there but by the time he "got ready" she was asleep. i told him i was going to get some ice cream then, cause i didnt wanna go if she wasnt awake, and he is like "By all means, go ahead". it INFURIATED ME. i felt like, damnit, i didnt need your permission to take MY CAR and go to the store. i went to lay down and just couldnt stop crying. it went from that, to crying about my mom thinking im a bad mom, to me being a bad influence on my siblings, to crying about how much i miss my son. its been such a long night my whole face is swollen =(
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I have 1 child & 4 angel babies & live in Tallahassee, Florida
account removed
posted 13th Jan '12
<blockquote><b>Quoting Kim Kardashian:</b>" If i would of known this thread was here i would have been in it a while back. I am in a mentally, emotionally, ... [snip!] ... always come and get us. Please pray for me and pray that i get out tomorrow. This marriage is starting to get worse and worse."</blockquote>




You should think about getting a protective order and if he does show up, call the cops. Good luck!
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I'm TTC since January '01 & live in Japan
posted 13th Jan '12
Quoting Kim Kardashian:" If i would of known this thread was here i would have been in it a while back. I am in a mentally, emotionally, ... [snip!] ... always come and get us. Please pray for me and pray that i get out tomorrow. This marriage is starting to get worse and worse."

i was wondering how you were doing and if you were able to get out.... I really REALLY hope you get out soon...maybe you should get a police escort like we suggested if he acted like that the other day...  I'll be praying for you please keep us updated! *hugs*
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I'm due November 13th, have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Maryland
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