re: Rape and Sexual Abuse Survivors Thread

Quoting Juliette:" "

I'm so sorry you went through that.

There are lots of women who don't report. That is completely up to you. However, if you don't go to the hospital then you lose the ability to later because a lot of evidence will be lost. However, it is your choice what to do, 100%. Sometimes I wish I'd prosecuted him, but other times I don't. I know at least trying to prosecute makes a lot of women feel better, but it's totally your choice in how you want to proceed.

Quoting Teagans_Mom:" I'm so sorry you went through that. There are lots of women who don't report. That is completely up ... [snip!] ... I know at least trying to prosecute makes a lot of women feel better, but it's totally your choice in how you want to proceed."

I don't think I'm going too. I just want to move on.

Quoting Juliette:" I don't think I'm going too. I just want to move on."

It's your choice, and no one should ever force you to make a different choice. You might want to talk to a rape crisis hotline or something before you make the choice though. Some women feel empowered by prosecuting their attackers. You can also get on BG secrets and ask the question if you don't want people to know you're asking and you'll likely get more responses on here. If you do that I can delete my responses here. If you're comfortable you can ask it on your regular account.

Quoting Teagans_Mom:" It's your choice, and no one should ever force you to make a different choice. You might want to talk ... [snip!] ... responses on here. If you do that I can delete my responses here. If you're comfortable you can ask it on your regular account."

I'm fine with it. I only have 1 friend on here that I know personally. I haven't showered yet, because i am still talking to my husband about weather I should press charges, but i really just don't want to go through that.

Quoting Juliette:" I'm fine with it. I only have 1 friend on here that I know personally. I haven't showered yet, because ... [snip!] ... because i am still talking to my husband about weather I should press charges, but i really just don't want to go through that."

And that's okay, but if you don't, you lose the ability to later.

I will say that I've heard very few people regret pressing charges but many women do wish they had later. It's sometimes about taking back some of that power. Again, it's totally up to you.

Quoting Teagans_Mom:" And that's okay, but if you don't, you lose the ability to later. I will say that I've heard very few ... [snip!] ... but many women do wish they had later. It's sometimes about taking back some of that power. Again, it's totally up to you."

Whats the process like of filing a report? Will they come to my house and let me file it that way? What happens after?

Quoting Reilly and Lila's Mommy:" I never reported. Sometimes I wish I could. But I know if I did that it would make things worse for ... [snip!] ... will make things better? Do you think that it's worth it for everyone to know? Do you want him to pay for what he did to you?"

IDK. I think in the end I would regret reporting it. Only a few close friends know. I don't want anyone to know, my dad, brothers, and uncles would end up in jail. I just don't know.

Quoting Juliette:" IDK. I think in the end I would regret reporting it. Only a few close friends know. I don't want anyone to know, my dad, brothers, and uncles would end up in jail. I just don't know."

I can understand that. I still haven't told any family. My situation was a little different, since I was a kid, but it's the same feeling. I don't want to hurt my family, or anything like that. It's a hard situation.

Quoting Juliette:" IDK. I think in the end I would regret reporting it. Only a few close friends know. I don't want anyone to know, my dad, brothers, and uncles would end up in jail. I just don't know."

I wish I would have had the choice to not report.It was so hard on me to have to face court after all I had gone through,but they reported while I was in a coma,so they made the choice for me.

Has anyone else had days or even weeks where they felt strong, and like they could talk about what happened without flashing back to it?
I have the instances where it's like I'm reliving it, but those are happening less and less... Does this mean I'm slowly getting over it for real, or will the flashbacks come back again like they used to, like a false recovery, for lack of a better term?

Quoting ~breakable~:" Has anyone else had days or even weeks where they felt strong, and like they could talk about what happened ... [snip!] ... over it for real, or will the flashbacks come back again like they used to, like a false recovery, for lack of a better term?"

I don't think anyone can answer that for you. It's a journey really, so you may be getting "better" but that doesn't mean you won't have hard times in the future where it gets worse for a while as well. The fact that you can talk about it is huge IMO though, because I'd think it means you really are healing instead of hiding though. I'll be hoping that you continue like this though, and just keep feeling better and better.

Quoting ~breakable~:" Has anyone else had days or even weeks where they felt strong, and like they could talk about what happened ... [snip!] ... over it for real, or will the flashbacks come back again like they used to, like a false recovery, for lack of a better term?"

It gets easier over time sometimes.I get to the point now I can talk about it four years later,but it is still really hard on me.

I've seen this thread around and I think I may be comfortable enough to join, if that's ok.