Quoting Sky0428:" Hello! My name is Sarah and I just joined this support group. I just lost my baby Boy at 21 weeks just ... [snip!] ... NOT live in Japan. Though I can speak some Japanese and eat their food. I actually live in Virginia. I'll fix that eventually.)"
Welcome moma! I'm so very sorry for your loss.
I lost my first baby (a girl) in Decemeber of 08. Night time was the worst for me also, you have nothing to occupy your thoughts. I spent most night for a long time crying. Just take it day by day moma, minute by minute, the pain will never completely go away but it does it easier to deal with.
The failure rate for cerclages is actually VERY small!!
We waited a year before trying again to allow my body and mind to heal (this is what my OB had reccomended) and I'm glad I waited. I liked that I was able to cry and feel hurt on her 1st birthday rather then feeling guilty because I had a young baby/newborn or was pregnant. We started trying midway through December 09, got pregnant on valentines day '10 and got our first positive test on the 2nd of march 2010. Our 2nd daughter is now a very happy very healthy 17 month old, thanks to a cerclage, tons of bedrest, and a cocktail of different medication! There is no reason why you and your husband should give up hope, you WILL take a baby home from the hospital and watch him/her grow, I'm sure!
Best wishes to you moma.